BET aired their “Hip Hop V.S America” series this week on Tuesday. The panel consisting of Hip Hop artists, Professors, Public Speakers, and models brought up many issues concerning Hip Hop and the state of the black community.
Guest speakers included T.I, Nelly, Master P, Mike Jones, and Melyssa Ford among many others. The hot topic on the panel seemed to be surrounding Nelly’s “Tip Drill” video and how it effected Black women to the point he was banned from a bone marrow drive at Spelman College. Watch the clip from Part I of the series where things get a little heated, as it it did during the rest of the show.
If you missed the whole thing, you can watch it over at BET. What were your thoughts on the discussion, did it bring out anything or was it just a waste? Do you think these artists don’t realize how much their music affects the black community, or are the two not related at all?
Nelly made some valid points and Melyssa Ford showed she was more than a video model. i commend them both.
lmfao MYLESSA FORD????…who da fuck is she besides another video hoe? Seriously…BET get it together for once. Geezus.
I PERSONALLY LOVED NELLY AND TI FOR STANDING UP AND SAYING WHAT OTHER RAPPERS MIGHT BE AFRAID TO SAY.
its about time they talk about relevant issues on BET
I thought Nelly was way too defensive and did not accept any fault for anything- he seemed to have someone to blame for everything.
Not to overly defend Melyssa Ford – but she once WAS a candidate for CSIS (the Canadian version of the CIA). Why she dumbed down I really don’t know. Sad, though.
Those assholes at BET make me laugh. They contribute to the degredation of us as a people but they want to put out “features” that discuss WHY these videos put our Black men and women down? They all need to go away for a while and take their stupid channel with them.
BUN DEM TO RASS!
i loved the show last nite and they kept on lookin back on nelly tipdrill video but he had a good point wat dey was doin up any ways i love me sum nelly and dey juss kept fuckin wit him and t.i. was good 2 he sooo cute wit dat cute ass smile…
Tayda
Glad you posted this I forgot all about part 2 and missed it! Overall I think the show was beneficially in seeing both sides of the argument.
Tianna I do believe that they realize it, but the main issue that I kept hearing was they aren’t the kids parents and that’s who should teach them right and wrong not their music. Yes parents should filter things mos def. In the same token it’s like you not only putting out music for adults because they not the mass watching videos and buying cds. So how can you not take some sort of responsibility. They are just putting out what the “believe” will make money as entertainers, so it is what is it! Do I believe things will change? No, so in the end I guess what did the program really accomplish?
I personally thought Nelly was contridicting himself. He made SOME valid points but he was saying that kids need to be raised at home first (TRUE) but what these rappers need to realize are that they are still looked upon as ROLE MODELS. You are doing your best to sell these CD’s so you can continue to enjoy your house in the hills. Parents should do there job at home but the realization is that these kids still pick up on these songs because they are catchy. I teach my daughter that if you dont understand what the song is really talking about don’t sing it because they all have a back story. Example: i heard a lil girl singing “i keep a white girl like Christina Augulera (whatever) but my thing is lil girl if you dont understand they are talking about drugs don’t sing it. Mad Love!
Anything negative is always going to have a large effect on society. Like everything else does…and negativity spreads quickly than positivity does. That’s why it’s important to make a conscience decision to always try to spread positive energy. Gangsta rap didn’t make people kill anyone however it fueled that attitude and the mood in people…the 90s was an angry time to grow up in hiphop and in the world. I was glad when Nelly came out because he was a party rapper…I love the party rappers and conscience rappers to help keep the peace in the hiphop community
I loved everything about both shows…
These videos don’t only put women down but they also disrespect our black men as well. Grow up BET and stop showing these dumb ass videos that disrespect out culture and everything our ancestors fought for. Stand up black people and get it together geeeezzzzzzzz. Iam a black women and I love my culture but dammit its embarrasing at time.
Fact of the matter is, we don’t need to see half naked big but black women in every video, got damn, can anyone think of another theme?
Nelly made some very valid points – esp. regarding the whole issue with the students @ Spelman protesting his bone marrow foundation the opportunity to come on campus. And his point about his label not wanting him to be on the panel.
The bottom line is – it is all big business, and if the big corporate record labels and television executives were really concerned about the negativity in the music and videos they could no longer support or publish it.
Yes, the artists do have a responsibilty, but so does the buying and consuming public. There is conscious rap and hip-hop music, but it’s not mainstream because mainstream does not support it.
It’s all about big business, and for all of the selling of their souls to the devil, ain’t none of them getting their money’s worth.
GROW UP BET AND STOP SHOWING THESE DEGRADING VIDEOS. OUR ANCESTORS FOUGHT FOR THERE LIVES AND THIS IS WHAT WE HAVE TO LIVE UP TO. DUMB ASS VIDEOS GEEEEZZZZZZ.. GET IT TOGETHER MY BLACK PEOPLE FORREAL AND BET AND MTV ARE HORRIBLE.. (SHAKING MY HEAD)
the show was worth watching if you dont like wat your children are watching monitor them in the house….. nelly made some valid points and so did t.i. micheal braisden was my boi when he rapped a lil lololololololo …. you cant see wat your kids are doing when they are not with you….. the woman on the panel with the short hair tried to blame hip hop on ery thang ….. music is the key to life and if you saying bitch in da house dont blame the word out side of the house…. a hoe is a hoe whether she in the video or not its the oldest profession dont blame hip hop blame society hoes come in all colors not just black so dont blame hip hop blame the home shit starts in the home lololol
I got sick of them talking about what white americans are doing and how they expose thier women. We still don’t get. Yes White Americans are the one whom set the standards in this country. We seem to always choose the negative, degrading things that this White society have established. Instead we should be taking from them the postive accomplishments along with our own. We have become FOLLOWERS. Forget about the fake hair and nails B.S. We are talking about the negative affects of the black community in association with Hip-hop/Rap music. Yes we are always going to be classified, no it’s never right, becsause everyone is different. But we need to put out more positive images of ourselves. That is the bottom line. It no time to be blaming another race for our shortcomings. We have to take responsibilty for ourselves and our actions.
I just hope that people, society does not treat this issue, (much like many issues that gain popularity and publicity in America), as something trivial, something that is great to talk about now, but in 2 weeks, it’s substituted with something else that’s relevant at that moment.
As much as we try, we cannot and should not shift the blame to the artists. David Banner has said it many times in recent memory (of me watching the congressional hearing as well as other interviews). It is our responsibility has people (men and women) to raise our kids right, be role models for them, not an artist. We don’t tell the Burger King clerk to be a role model, or the bank teller, and the fact is, music is a career for those people, and that’s their job.
Of course it would be good if they used their influence to steer our children in the right direction, but the fact remains that they got off into that direction because we didn’t do a good enough job in showing them the correct path. The reasons behind that open up an entirely new debate.
My question to any parent who has a problem with the music that’s being played on radio or television is, how many letters have you written to these companies saying the programming is disrespectful, and negatively influencing my children? How many of you who have something against the artist’s content go out and buy their cd or tune in to 106 and park, or buy the single “shake ya ass and give me money” on itunes? This world is all about the mighty dollar. that speaks louder to execs than samuel jackson with a loud speaker!
another point…music has always help bring about a change in people. that’s history and a fact. Our black ancestors would sing spirituals to forget about their situation and stay alive. Music has brought whole nations together…it has also built a bridge amongst generations and cultures. The people that don’t understand it should criticize it, that’s like me criticizing Arabic music or something. How am I gone criticze something I don’t know nothing about???? STOP JUDGING WHAT U DON’T KNOW… typical for people that live in America!
I don’t really watch videos and I don’t allow my daughter to watch them I don’t use profanity in my home so I don’t allow my child to listen to music with degrading material. That goes for t.v. shows, also. I am at home making sure of what my daughter is watching and listening to. Yes, it does start in the home. I was raise with know this and I am definitely going to pass on to my daughter. This way she will understand that you have the power of choice.
oops…people that don’t understand *shouldn’t* criticize
And since when did Nelly and T.I. represent positive rappers?
“Drop down and get yo eagle on girl” -Nelly “Flap Your Wings”
Can we get Talib Kweli or Common as spokespersons? BET keeps trying to do something positive and it ends up looking a hot mess.
like t.i and the bible says it wrong to judge…dont blame hiphop for what ur children do..blame yourself
They say the same thing all the time about this issue, either do something about it or debate another issue. Hip- Hop should not dominate every discussion.
to compton_chick23: that why they are on there cuz they are not postive rappers…people want to know why they say the things they do
@ compton_chick,
I think that they needed Nelly and T.I. on the panel because their type of music gets criticized. So having Common and concious rappers on there really would have been pointless!
“It takes lemons to make lemonade!”
A few points.
1. Critics of Nelly, Luda, etc., are not saying they started the use of the N word, the degredation of black women, materialism, violence, etc. They are saying cut down on the glamorization of those things.
2. Luda, etc., appear to have NO IDEA WHATSOVEVER that their music, videos, etc., influence society. They seem to have NO CLUE, that Hip Hop influences, fashion, slang, dance, swagger, attitudes, and so many other things. They seem to have NO IDEA that something happening in their own personal hoods’ when placed on a INTERNATIONAL FORUM has ripple effects across the world.
3. They are using Parents as a scapegoat. I think we all know that it’s the parents responsibility to raise their children correctly. That would be great wouldn’t it? But the reality is a lot of parents do not, and the Hip Hop community knows this. And because they know it, they should be a bit more responsible with what they produce. I personally think my parents did a great job with me, but I was still influenced by things they didn’t know about. Despite their efforts in trying to protect me from certain things, when I was at school or out with my friends, I was exposed to it anyway. Again, at the end of the day it is the Parents responsibility to monitor what their kids see and hear, but ON THE REAL, we all know kids are influenced by more than parents.
Bottom line is PEOPLE NEED TO RAISE THEIR OWN DAMN KIDS. Stop sitting them in front of the tv, radio, or whatever, and then take your sorry ass somewhere or leave the kids alone with anybody, then trying to blame somebody else when your child messes up.
Stop getting high and drinking in front of your kids if you don’t want them to become alcoholics or drug addicts.
Stop parading different men and women in and out of your life if you don’t want them to become whores.
JUST STOP!!!
@SUPERCENT yes! someone with common sense
it’s not just about the children, it is about us as black ppl. i get so embarrassed when i see these negative images b/c although they don’t define me in my eyes, they define my race in other races’ eyes and that hurts. we can’t stop prejudice or stereotypes but if we put out more positive images of ourselves, stereotypes for the most part will have no foundation.
Im not against hip hop, but I definately think it has an effect on the way people, teens mostly, think. I can’t say all teens because there are some teens who were brought up properly and were taught about good and bad things, when u teach a little child about good or bad things, he remembers and tries to do wat is good. This is becasue young children are very influential. The influential stages may still extend to an older age, but what they need is a role model, and not someone they see on tv talkin about bad things
i got a ? for black women on here now i aint defending degrading black women but nelly said some real shit but didn’t get a answer.
would you all not be outraged if rappers put white,asian and latino in there and stop putting black women in the videos would y’all like that?
then look at what t.i said if he bring a video with women dressed up in a woman dress suit bet aint going to play that.
i mean just don’t know what rappers can do the video are way less degrading than they use to be.
but i doubt black women would like if they weren’t even in the videos i just don’t see what option the rappers have because either way someone isn’t going to like it the choice they make.
Poster # 30 New Yorker very well said.
@hayday12 please don’t bring the “do not judge” saying b/c there are so many ppl on this site that judge others based on race, sexuality, way of dressing etc. so that only highlights hypocrisy. t.i. may judge ppl on a daily basis
Melyssa Ford showing she’s more than a “video model” ? please, she has text message commercials moaning and groaing saying “ohhhhh send me a text” . I hate phony people . She’s no better than superhead IMO.
Birdmane12, I think the better question would be WHY WOULDN’T BET PLAY A T.I. VIDEO WITH WOMEN IN A SUIT? Why is it at one time you could not get on Def Comedy Jam if you refused to say the n-word? Those are the questions.
.I’m not cheering on negativity, but truthfully speaking there’s good and bad in everything. If it was all good, how would we know the difference? I’m just speaking the truth, music is a reflection of a feeling an attitude. Most days than not, I’m typically a good person…but some days I want to curse people out, have an attitude, feel cocky, etc.
I personally don’t want to hear all my music be about marshmallows and stars and rainbows, or politics and power to the people.
Every human have to decide for themselves on a daily basis, what’s good or bad for THEM, not for everybody else. Be responsible for you. And as far as kids are concerned, no matter how much you try to keep bad stuff away from them (which I think is great) they still will hear or see it in some form or fashion. Real Talk!
Birdmane12, I think the better question would be WHY WOULDN’T BET PLAY A T.I. VIDEO WITH WOMEN IN A SUIT? Why is it at one time you could not get on Def Comedy Jam if you refused to say the n-word? Those are the questions.
cause bet is about rating and bet may think don’t nobody want to see a woman in a business suit rather than a bikini.
ya know so at the end of the day t.i job is about getting his video played and don’t to many videos get played with a woman in a business suit.
its sad but true.
man..all i kno iz that i ♥ watchin’ it. itz jst real!!
@birdmane12 if t.i. feels tis way, he should get together with a group of other rappers who feel the same way and do something about it. wouldn’t it be great if they could stand up and say something instead of fueling the machine? yeah, we can say “but that’s their job” but really their record labels need them just as much as they need their record labels. i would respect t.i. so much more if he would express his feelings about him having to do certain things to get by. and about the issue of black women in vids, that’s involved with colorism so it’s hard to add that in the discussion. it’s kind of like if a supposed friend of yours was hosting a weed party but didn’t invite you, even though you know drugs are bad, wouldn’t you be offended? that means the person never really liked you (assuming of course that the person didn’t know you hated drugs). same with the colorism and vids. i don’t agree with a lot of what the women do but i’m offended that our society deems beauty to be intertwined with certain skin tones or races. that answer your question
I liked it. I wish the show could have been longer. Nelly seemed too defensive, but he made many valid points…some I never thought of. Basically they said Hip-Hop is not responsible for the state of the black community but rather a mirror of what goes on in the black community.
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Nelly is right nobody forces these hoes to get in these videos, they’re all grown women, and for that lady that says why does he have one representation of women in video. should he start havin bunch of fat bitches in them, i personally think these women in hip hop videos are how beautiful black women should look like. Women are not offended by rap because i see them shaking they asses to songs lile ”hey papi”,”big pimpin” ouchie wally” and even tip drill.
if u a ho, i’mma call u a ho , too many bitches is shade-Jay-Z(22 two’s)
Wow! I missed a good show. But BET will probably re-run it like 1,358,284,687,951 times. I’ll make sure I’ll remember to tune in next time.
NELLY DESERVE A ROUND OF APPLAUD FOR EVERYTHING HE SAID LAST NIGHT. WHEN QUESTIONS WHERE THROWN AT HIM , HE KNEW JUST THE RIGHT THING TO SAY. HE DIDNT SUGER COAT ANYTHING UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE. WHEN THAT STUPID LADY FROM ESSENCE MADE A STUPID COMMENT ABOUT THE TRIP DRILL VIDEO. HE CAME UP WITH A GOOD ANSWER AND MADE HER LOOK STUPID. WHEN HE WAS TALKING TO THAT DUMB LADY FROM SPELMAN, SHE WAS LOOKING LIKE SHE WAS STUPID TOO.
PEOPLE DEGRADING HIM WHEN THAT WHOLE INCIDENT WAS GOING ON DOWN SPELMAN …I DIDNT. WHAT SAD IS PEOPLE LABEL HIM AND HE IS NOTHING LIKE SOME OF THESE OTHER RAPPERS. HE CAN TALK THE TALK AND WALK THE WALK. HE HAVE A WONDERFUL ORGANIZATION FOR KIDS, HE DO THINGS FOR HIS NEIGHBOR HOOD. HE IS A GOOD ROLE MODEL PLAIN AND SIMPLE
MYLESSA FORD IS MORE THEN A VIDEO VIXEN. SHE MADE MORE SENSE THEN TI TRYING TO BE FUNNY AZZ. WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT HER BEING A VIDEO GIRL BECAUSE SHE NEEDED MONEY TO GET A HIGHER EDUCATION WAS REAL. MOST PEOPLE LOOK AT VIDEO GIRLS AS BEING UNEDUCATED AND WHATEVER ELSE THEY THINK. I LOOK AT SOME OF THEM AS HANDLING THEIR BUSINESS. LIKE NELLY SAID, SOME OF THEM HAVE CHILDREN TO FEED, AND A EDUCATION TO PAY FOR. THEY JUST DOING WHAT THEY CAN DO, TO SURVIVE IN THIS WORLD. I’M NOT GOING TO KNOCK HER FOR BEING A VIDEO GIRL. SHE DID IT TOO BETTER HERSELF AND SHE HAVE THE BRAINS AND THE BEAUTY.
I think both sides made good points. The political speakers and professors had good points on how this voilence and negitive image have negitive effect on the black community, but the rappers also had good points when they said they don’t hold a gun to these young ladies head and force them to shake they butt in a camera and how you can’t blame hip hop for everything gone wrong.
Quit blaming and start fixing thats the only way things are going to change this what these people need to realize.
Birdmane12 good question and I was waiting for someone to mention that. And to be honest they already started. The higher in their careers they get the less sisters you see in their videos. Some are first generation mixed looking which is beautiful too but if they are Black women they are the light skin ones. I have noticed that with a lot of videos. Look at Chris Brown video kiss kiss. It was hard for me to even spot a chick that was the true definition of a chocolate sister. The last artist I saw try to put a dark skin chick as the leading role was Jahiem in his video a woman’s worth and T-pain sometimes.
I mean it’s like the sisters are good enough to shake their butt but when it come to the leading roles they get pushed back a lot. Which I do not understand but hey maybe that is just me. But I also think women should take a stand and demand not to be portrayed as the booty shaker in every video. But like the girl said some do it for the money so they do not care how they are portrayed. The girls in the videos now are pretty but we need more variation even though I am a light brown myself I still got love for my other sisters too who beauty are not being seen or looked over a lot.
I’m not sure what to do about this issue. I personally don’t purchase any music that I deam offensive. But I also understand that my lack of support doesn’t really affect the artist. The fact remains that 70% of the consumers are white. What saddens me is that rappers believe they are not responsible for their music and the effect that it has on others. If music can make you feel sexy and attractive couldn’t it also make you feel disgusting and repulsive. At some point they must recognize the power they have and become responsible for their effect on the masses.
@32 I would not feel better if the rappers were degrading women of other races but I find it funny that they seem to have no problem doing it continually to their own.
QUESTION??? If tomorrow all of our black youth started glorifying hard metal rock n roll would we did be complaining about hip hop????
2. Is it BET fault that we don’t have more than one black t.v. network?
3. Isn’t it our discretion if we watch the degrading videos?
4. Did we forget there is a point to BET uncut?
5. Isn’t it the parents responsibility to control what their children watch?
6. When did Hip Hop go from being one aspect of blacks to representing us as a whole?
7. How are they selling it if PEOPLE are not buying it?
8. If we had more than just BET would we really be focusing on it so much.
Answer: No b/c America did the same thing with HBO and when other networks were develop our interest was redirected b/c we had other channels to watch. HBO is still the same at NIGHT but due to diversity on t.v. we simply decided to watch something else!!!
Now I understand that some go to far. I rarely even watch BET but I did see this because I felt it was important. Hip Hop doesn’t represent me. It’s just music. I represent me and I represent Christ. My parents taught me the difference b/t reality and fantasy. Now it is up to us to teach our children the same.
@birdmane12 if t.i. feels tis way, he should get together with a group of other rappers who feel the same way and do something about it. wouldn’t it be great if they could stand up and say something instead of fueling the machine? yeah, we can say “but that’s their job” but really their record labels need them just as much as they need their record labels. i would respect t.i. so much more if he would express his feelings about him having to do certain things to get by. and about the issue of black women in vids, that’s involved with colorism so it’s hard to add that in the discussion. it’s kind of like if a supposed friend of yours was hosting a weed party but didn’t invite you, even though you know drugs are bad, wouldn’t you be offended? that means the person never really liked you (assuming of course that the person didn’t know you hated drugs). same with the colorism and vids. i don’t agree with a lot of what the women do but i’m offended that our society deems beauty to be intertwined with certain skin tones or races. that answer your question
come on your living in a dream world if you think t.i going to do that most likely that will hurt his sells because a lot of people aint going to like that.
look at the rapper chamillionaire he said i aint going to curse anymore on the album were he was cursing he sold a 1 million records on his new one he debuted at 70,000.
he might be lucky if he go gold now he gave in to everyone saying stop saying the n word ho or bitch and none of those people showed up at the record stores ya know.
i know a lot of people who are not happy at all that he stopped cursing like he did before and didn’t buy his new album and i think it would be the same for t.i.
most of the people that wont the videos to clean up don’t even purchase these artist albums or like rap music at all.
and with your second part so you admit you would be offended so then i don’t know what rappers can do bet aint going to play no woman in a business suit,black women don’t like them selves being in the videos and black women wont like themselves not being in the video so i don’t see any choice for the rappers.
i’m glad BET did it and I’m glad the panel was articulate. Too bad the biggest offenders couldn’t be there, but better for the discussion since they can’t string together an intelligible sentence anyway. TI talking about raising kids and morals just makes me SMH.
The main issue here is $. Hip hop artists want $ and they don’t care what damage they do to get it. Thug life is glorified so TI can have an LV birthday cake. If they weren’t paid to be thugs they wouldn’t be. The only way to change it is at the cash register. You can have all the panel discussions you want, but until people stop buying this music and going to the shows it will never change.
So MarvinJH, these rappers are willing to sell out their OWN PEOPLE and degrade THEIR OWN WOMEN just for the check? That says a lot about T.I. and Nelly.
Woww……I mean….if you really really really think about it is T.I. and Nelly apart of the problem?? To me there are waaaay worse “rappers” who talk about nothing but sex i.e. Trillville, Lil Webbie, etc. Why werent they there??? And furthermore, do the rappers have a responsibility as far as lyrical content: yes to a certain degree. Are the parents, not the artist, responsible explaining the difference within music : yes. No one is to blame here….well maybe the music industry!! They are SOLELY in business for SELLING music and not cultivationg an artist!! So if talkin about shakin ass, gettin money, bustin on someones face is sellling they are going to find an “artist” who says alllllll that stuff and make them a celebrity over night AND cash in!!! Feel me?
Sometimes I can’t stand Al but he made a great point. Why do we base our race and our actions on what another race thinks of us? I hear it on this board alot. Example. Nelly did such and such, this make white people think about us even worse. Why should I care what white people think about me, when they been judging my culture and race even before my ancestors could speak this language.
Oh yeah….if yall FOOLS stop buyin that nonsense it would be a change the industry will have to make!! Dummy…………..
the choice is not to make that type of video. i think our american culture is so warped. we talk so much about how strong and individualistic we are yet all i see are followers. chamillionaire had good intentions but he’s not that big of a rapper. he doesn’t have as much influence as t.i.. i already know t.i. isn’t courageous enough to say “hey ppl listen. i do this b/c my label makes me do it and i don’t don’t want to do it anymore.” he hides behind that whole making paper notion and uses it as an excuse. i already know t.i. wouldn’t say anything so no, i don’t live in a make believe world. clearly i’m saying that i would love it if that happened and would respect him more if he could stand up for himself instead of whoring himself out there.
MarvinJH said: most of the people that wont the videos to clean up don’t even purchase these artist albums or like rap music at all.
That is true in some cases MarvinJH, but what they DO know is those negative images affects us all as black people. For example, the very first time Oprah Winfrey stepped into Nelson Mandella’s house in South Africa, his security team greeted them as N*ggas, because they thought that is the way Black American’s like to be addressed? Now, I personally believe Hip Hop had a hand in why that happened. There are many black people who have traveled the world and had similar experiences because that is what they mostly see from us as Black Americans.
The images a few of us put out to the world affects us ALL, whether it should be or not. That is real.
Stop using the TV as a substitute for a babysitter for your children. It is no one else’s responsibility to teach your children morals and values. Nelly, Melyssa Ford, or any other entertainer should be held accountable for being a role model for your children. Celebrities are human just like everyone else, it is up to the parent to provide a decent example for their children to live by.
no he didnt try and talk about the bible!!! he needs to stop…though i really do hate the “hip hop bashing” that goes on from these blind sided black folks…i do feel like the artist need to take responsibility for the fact that they are public figures..whether they like it or not!
Poster # 54 Softestplaceonearth, we should care because we are not the only people on this planet. We have to live with other people in this world, and if we make the world believe we are all immoral savages, the world will begin to treat us that way. Let’s face it, most of the power in America is in the hands of white people, and if they think I’m going to rob them because that is most of the images we as black people present to this world, that may affect my getting a job I want.
I’m not saying black people should live their lives for the sake of what other races will think, but we cannot lose site of the fact we are not alone in this world.