Meet Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of North Carolina. They have been married 85 years (86 in May) and hold the Guinness World Record for the longest marriage of a living couple and get this…. Zelmyra is 101 years old and Herbert is 104.
The happily married couple teamed up with twitter this Valentine’s Day to answer some relationship questions. Check out their take on finding love, getting through hard times and more. Good read.
1. What made you realize that you could spend the rest of your lives together? Were you scared at all?
H & Z: With each day that passed, our relationship was more solid and secure.Divorce was NEVER an option – or even a thought.2. How did you know your spouse was the right one for you?
We grew up together & were best friends before we married. A friend is for life – our marriage has lasted a lifetime3. Is there anything you would do differently after more than 80 years of marriage?
We wouldn’t change a thing. There’s no secret to our marriage, we just did what was needed for each other & our family.4. What is your advice to someone who is trying to keep the faith that Mr. Right is really out there?
Zelmyra: Mine was just around the corner! He is never too far away, so keep the faith – when you meet him, you’ll know.
5. What was the best piece of marriage advice you ever received?
Respect, support & communicate with each other.Be faithful, honest & true.Love each other with ALL of your heart
6. What are the most important attributes of a good spouse?
Zelmyra: A hard worker & good provider.The 1920s were hard,but Herbert wanted & provided the best for us.I married a good man!
7. What is your best Valentine’s Day memory?
Zelmyra: I cook dinner EVERY day.Herbert left work early & surprised me – he cooked dinner for me! He is a VERY good cook!
Herbert: I said that I was going to cook dinner for her & she could relax – the look on her face & clean plate made my day!
8. You got married very young – how did u both manage to grow as individuals yet not grow apart as a couple?
“Everyone who plants a seed & harvests the crop celebrates together” We are individuals, but accomplish more together.
9. What is your fondest memory of your 85-year marriage?
Our legacy: 5 children, 10 grandchildren, 9 great-grandchildren, and 1 great-great grandchild.
10. Does communicating get easier with time? How do you keep your patience?
The children are grown, so we talk more now. We can enjoy our time on the porch or our rocking chairs – together.
11. How did you cope when you had to be physically separated for long periods of time?
Herbert: We were apart for 2 months when Z was hospitalized with our 5th child. It was the most difficult time of my life. Zelmyra’s mother helped me with the house and the other children, otherwise I would have lost my mind.
12. At the end of bad relationship day, what is the most important thing to remind yourselves?
Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win
13. Is fighting important?
NEVER physically! Agree that it’s okay to disagree, & fight for what really matters. Learn to bend – not break!
14. What’s the one thing you have in common that transcends everything else?
We are both Christians & believe in God.Marriage is a commitment to the Lord.We pray with & for each other every day.
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They also closed out the Q&A with one last message: We wish we could answer more questions! Thanks for your support and interest in our story – we are overwhelmed. And we wish you a happy Valentine’s Day – may it be filled with love and joy. God bless you all, Herbert and Zelmyra.
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UPDATE: Herbert passed away in February of 2011 at the age of 105. Click here to read the article..
Awwwww…..that is so sweet, i want that to happen to me
WOW!! 85 years! That’s amazing. I like there take on fighting “Learn to bend – not break!” Good advice. LOL
How beautiful. A real treat to read on Valentine’s Day, thanks CL
That what Im talking about you gotta stick togther till the wheels fall off!
AMEN LORD!!!. THIS SHUD BE MY TESTIMONY AS WELL ONE DAY.
–hmmm….seems like someone was rocking the cradle…congrats!!
That’s my dream!!!
Awe thats so sweet, ya see people true love never fails!!!!
that’s really sweet
oooh this is sooo sweet! cutest thing i’ve ever read. so great to read something like this especially when your bombarded with a myriad of trivial things like celebrity drama sometimes.
Wow at both their marriage and age. This is incredible!!
That is awesome! So touching!!
Please God bring him to me!
——–ugh i hate when the margins cut off! From what I could read, this was very —————- interesting article. That margin thing seems to be a reoccurring issue on ——– this site!
Black love is beautiful!!!!!
This is the definition of real love.
Aww so amazing. So sweet
This was great! It’s wonderful to see a long lasting, true love relationship. The advice was really practical and honest. Great highlight for V’Day
WOW…A couple after my own heart. Kudos to them. I wish them many more years together. Who says black love does not exist? This proves otherwise. WOW. I am saving this article as a reminder that it can be done. Thank you Mr./Mrs Fisher.
beautiful … i love the answer to #6
ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!! WOW BLACK LOVE IS BEAUTIFUL!!!! I HOPE THIS HAPPENS TO ME I WANT TO BE WITH JUST ONE BLACK MAN FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!
wow. MARRIED AND HAPPY. they gave great advice. a black couple that lasted 85 years is a testament to what we can have once we learn to stop all this hollywood ish and make a pact to get along.
she is 101 and he is 104. it seems to me when you are loved you live longer! lol
beauitful !
love it .
happy vday everyone !
Awww, too cute! this is how real relationships should be.
Awwwww!!!
I am so proud that a BLACK couple holds the record for longest marriage…it seems we’re always being told that marriage is not for us…thanks for posting this great story and I wish the happy couple many more happy years to come!
Great choice on V-Day!!
these ole people prolly suffers from Alzheimers. Looking in each others face each day and don’t know who the fuk they looking at. thats why they still together. after about 65 they totally forgot they were married.
inspired.
sidenote: divorce really shouldn’t ever be an option… or thought.
oh… and many many congrats to them of course!
WOW!!! this is awesome…
wowwww, what an amazing and inspirational luv story…CONGRATULATIONS luv birds, God Bless…
My soulmate and I are 11 yrs, were right behind you, lol thanks for the insight
Great Role Models!!!
Thanks for sharing this story with us CL.
Sweet!
THIS WAS TRULY INSPIRING! I been married 10years and LOVE IT. I can only pray and hope to have such an successful marriage like these two. God bless them!
This is wonderful. I always say the same thing, you’ll definitely know when you meet Mr. or Mrs. Right.
@ Meme what an ignorant thing to say. All elderly people don’t have Alzheimer’s!!
This is beautiful and a true testament to BLACK LOVE. My grandparents (both sets) have been together for over 50 years. I’m married too, one year, and I am looking forward to many more beautiful years with my hubby!!!
That is so beautiful. You can tell they still love each other after all that time. That is amazing. They gave some great advice too. Awwww, that made my day =D
This is absolutely incredible! I love it; such an inspiration!
Thank you GOD this is an African American couple. See, my people, it can be done. Black couples can make it work, we a capable of loving eachother, we are capable of getting married to eachother, we are capable of STAYING together. We are capable of not only killing eachother, as they like to say. WE ARE CAPABLE, is the new motto.
Have a blessed and Happy V-day, you all.
Bless them, they are truly an inspiration.
I like how she didn’t say much but she said just enough ….Beauitful Hopefully they use there words of widsom beyond this and write a book for couples who might be struggling with there marriage or newly weds clearly you can grow old together and have a stronger realtionship then ever
Incredible. Point 12 was especially good. How things have changed (/degraded) since their day though…
I love it…..i hope this is me one day!!! This inspires me to keep the faith and know that someone is out there for me or better yet right in front of my face!!
i pray for this
LOVE IT!
“Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win”
That is the truth right there. God Bless them.
A really good answer, full of ratioanlity!
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GOD BLESS THEM!
ANGEL, thank you for posting this! It is wonderful to see love that lasts a lifetime, especially for a black woman.
And she is so right on: you WILL know. keep the faith, sisters! I wish you all joyful, enduring love.
black love…..LOVE IT! this totally made my day. Much love to them both!
Inspiring.
Oh wow best friends always make the perfect couple cause i mean its not a whole lot you dont tell your BFF so i so agree with this advice…. not saying that everyone should get married to their BFF lol lmao
God Bless them. They made it!!!!!! Thats a long as time too to be with one person! WOW
God bless that couple! I look forward to reaching that with my husband and always love to hear words of wisdom from elder married couples.
This is truly inspiring especially in todays society where so many people don’t value or respect the union of marriage. I thank God for my husband and being married at 25, I love our ups and downs because it only makes us stronger and closer. Seeing this story made my day!
Wow, amazing!
In the midst of recently finding love with someone I grew up with, this story is so inspiring. At the age of 26, I’ve known this man for 22 years and never thought to look to him for love. I’m so glad I did! God bless them and Happy Valentine’s Day!
That is just amazingly beautiful! True inspiration for me and my hubby!
He looks pretty much the same! What a sweet couple.